The Collapse of the Stapler Industry

25 Nov

Throughout the history of the United States, the economy has fluctuated. There are times when the economy is running on all cylinders, and there are times when it slows to a crawl. The bad economic times have been given many names. Depressions. Recessions. Panics. Downturns. No matter the name, they all mean the same thing. Businesses close. People lose jobs. It is a tough situation for a lot of people.

We have faced one of these low economic periods over the past few years, and, hopefully, we are coming out of it. Various industries have faced difficult times. However, I am convinced that one industry has had it tougher than all the rest. Apparently, manufacturing reached a near standstill. Sales plummeted. It has been total economic chaos.Factory

What industry am I writing about?

The stapler industry.

This may come as a surprise to many of you, but the stapler industry, from my observations, has been hit harder than any other.

What is my proof?

College students cannot find a stapler for their papers. The other day, they turned in a research assignment, and most of them were loose-leafed when they were handed to me. With that few papers stapled, I can only surmise that there is a devastating stapler shortage in our country, which can only be explained by an economic collapse in that industry.

In fact, I am convinced that the stapler in my office is one of the last in existence because random people will show up at my door and ask to use it. Luckily, I also have a box of staples to go with it. What will we do when that box runs out?

I reckon students will have to use paperclips to attach their pages. Or, they might have to do the unthinkable and put their papers in a folder.

The collapse of the stapler industry has been devastating for many people. Jobs lost. Investments vanished. However, college students have been negatively affected, as well. After long searches for something that is impossible to find, they are forced to turn in assignments in a haphazard way. I pity them.

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8 Responses to “The Collapse of the Stapler Industry”

  1. HappyApathy November 25, 2014 at 19:06 #

    What will become of all those staple removers?

    • Rick November 25, 2014 at 20:20 #

      That’s another industry that is facing hard times.

  2. Andrew Petcher November 25, 2014 at 19:32 #

    My granddaughters love my stapler. They will staple together anything that doesn’t move!

    • Rick November 25, 2014 at 20:21 #

      Now, there is hope in the future generations.

  3. Marilyn Armstrong November 25, 2014 at 20:59 #

    Did they write their papers in text-speak too? PAPER CLIPS are gone too. The world used to be swimming in paper clips. Nobody ever used them to clip papers, but they are the all time BEST device for poking in that little hole. Without staplers and paper clips, it will be a devastatingly unfastened world. I fear the worst.

    • Rick November 25, 2014 at 22:27 #

      I haven’t read the papers, but I know what I’m in for. I can’t imagine a world with unbound paper. It’ll be devastating.

  4. sittingpugs November 26, 2014 at 02:19 #

    What about the single hole-punch puncher?

    • Rick November 26, 2014 at 02:27 #

      Sadly, it is disappearing, as well.

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