Death by Meeting

11 Apr

I was going to do a little blogging last night, but after sitting in a two-hour meeting listening to my brain cells scream as they jumped to their deaths, I decided that it just wasn’t in me to put fingers to keyboard. On top of that, I had to watch the season finale of Justified, the third greatest show in television history. As you can tell by the title, this post isn’t about the show. It is about the meeting that I had to sit through.

Before my rant, I must say that the people on the committee are good folks. They volunteer their time to help the community, and I commend them for it. I am more of a big idea guy who likes to think stuff up and back away to let someone else do the work. However, there are times when people get focused on the details and forget the big picture. Last night’s meeting was about details and went something like this.

Minutes – You know when people take the time to read the minutes of the last meeting word-for-word that it is going to be along night. Needless to say, we talked about the minutes for a while.

Sunshine Report – This is where announcements are made about people being sick or having other troubles. This is a nice thing to do I suppose. I’m not sure why it is in the regular meeting because these things can be talked about after. But, it was fine except for the lady who talked about her own problems. She is going into the hospital next week and needs our prayers. Something about that makes me feel weird. I’m not sure people should announce their own problems.

Committee Reports – This didn’t take long at all. We talked about buying some heaters for a few minutes. This despite the fact that there is no money. How do I know this? Because the treasurer didn’t show up for the Treasurer’s Report that was supposed to come before the Sunshine Report.

(Oh, I should tell you that the committee oversees a historic village in my town. It’s not really historic because old buildings have been moved there, and new ones that look old have been added to it. I’ve tried to tell them it’s not really historic, but I am only a history professor and really don’t know what I am talking about.)

Controversy arose during this part because of a scheduling conflict. There is a free event and a pay event Saturday. The guy in charge of the pay event was concerned that free people might get in. The chairwoman of the committee got really upset and said the free event has been planned for a year, and the pay event needs to work with it. This is a good time to remind you that we have no money.

Next, the pay event guy talked about his big project – live online streaming of country music from our site. It sounds good, but I don’t trust him. He’s from Australia, but each time he talks I think of the word carpetbagger. He has been talking about this for a year without anything happening. There always seems to be an excuse.

Also, we are building the world’s largest dinner triangle – you know, a thing that people rang on farms to tell field hands that food was ready. It looks like this.

Except, ours is going to be 10 feet on each side.

After this announcement, it was time to talk about acquiring more buildings. Remember, we have no money, so adding buildings is a good idea. Old buildings are expensive to keep up but adding some more shouldn’t be a problem.

One good idea came out of this part of the meeting. We are going to inventory our possessions. I was going to suggest some ways to protect our artifacts, but that’s really not the point I reckon.

Once the committee reports were completed, we moved to Future Projects. They are working on a 25th Anniversary book and want to copy Foxfire. I hope they don’t plagiarise.

Of course, we also talked about the upcoming county fair. We have the largest one in Tennessee don’t you know. Very impressive indeed.

Finally, we got to Unfinished Business, and a local producer of commemorative knives presented the idea of us buying some. We could put our name on the blade and sell them. Unfortunately, buying the knives will cost $16,500, and we have a lot of commemorative stuff that’s been lying around for years. I wonder how much building maintenance we could do for $16,500.

That;s it for the meeting, but I have one more pet peeve. People involved in this village address each other in a strange way. They call people Mr. Joe or Miss Jane – mixing prefix titles with first names. I’m not sure it’s bad, but I think it’s weird.

That was my meeting. When it was over, I was thinking it would have been better to be in a shootout with Raylan or Boyd. You’re probably thinking that also would have been better than reading this post.

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10 Responses to “Death by Meeting”

  1. someonehadtosaythis April 11, 2012 at 21:21 #

    I love you and hate we don’t work together anymore. You speak the truth, friend!

    • surroundedbyimbeciles April 11, 2012 at 23:23 #

      Thanks for the support. It is probably rude to ask, but who is this?

      • Amber Hurdle (@amberhurdle) April 11, 2012 at 23:27 #

        It’s not rude to ask. LOL. I don’t know why it gave me that OLD, never used blog name. Logged in from my phone. t’s just Amber.

      • surroundedbyimbeciles April 11, 2012 at 23:30 #

        I figured it out. Ha. It hit me after I replied. You have secret identities everywhere. If I need a good comedy show I know who to turn to.

  2. John April 11, 2012 at 22:58 #

    I feel your pain, brother.

    • surroundedbyimbeciles April 11, 2012 at 23:25 #

      To quote Dr. Zachary Smith – “The pain. The pain.”

  3. Amber Hurdle (@amberhurdle) April 12, 2012 at 01:35 #

    Wow, I didn’t realize you had a flock of women in the wings who require you to ponder who might be telling you they love you online. Kinda impressed. Almost hated to disappoint you that it was just me, homie. Lol

    • surroundedbyimbeciles April 12, 2012 at 01:54 #

      Ha. Just checking. You never know who might pop up.

  4. Mark R. Cheathem April 12, 2012 at 17:09 #

    I swear, I thought the dinner bell was a hangman image indicating your state of mind after the meeting.

    • surroundedbyimbeciles April 12, 2012 at 18:01 #

      That is not a bad observation. The gallows come out after some meetings that we both attend.

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